Baby Steps

So now I am out in the world and stabilized. I had made the decision to live in Fort Worth but I knew nothing of the area except that small portion between Sundance Square and Union Gospel Mission on E. Lancaster. What was I suppose to do?

The Social Worker from the jail had assured me that I would be living in a group home and that I was to call the manager once I was released. I called him but there was no answer. I proceeded down familiar roads carrying a bag of clothes and what little money I had made at North Texas Hospital. You see because I was doing well at the facility; they have a work program earning money shredding paper. So with that money I proceeded out into the world. The bank was closed and I was in a strange but familiar city.

I asked a gentleman, at the bus stop, where there was a place to spend a nite? He told me that there was a place off Lancaster that was ok for $30.00 a nite. So, with bag in hand, I proceeded to take the bus to Lancaster and found the motel. It wasn't the best place in the world but it was shelter. It had a bed and some amenities so it would be better than spending the nite out in the cold. During the nite I thanked God that I was alive and I would call the manager of the group home in the morning. I could barely sleep because of the noises I heard and the anxiousness that I felt, but I tried.

Early the next morning, I awoke and called the manager. He responded that he would pick me up and take me to the group home. I anticipated the worst and expected the best that I could get was a room to stay. When the manager came we went to the East side of Fort Worth and I was amazed to see the homes in the area. I was, however, warned that I shouldn't walk during the nite and I knew what that meant. This wasn't the best part of town.

I met all the members of the group home and was amazed to see that I was in a home with individuals that were in worst shape than I was before. I was befriended by the house manager and started living in a group setting. The first nite was the hardest because I had to go through an initiation by the members. One of the members of the home, placed an empty can of beer in my clothes. I, however, saw this and made a statement at the house meeting that someone was trying to put me into jeopardy of being kicked out of the home. This was resolved with a strong message by the manager and was resolved immediately.

I proceeded through the weeks that I stayed at the group home to find my way through Fort Worth. I remember indeed that one day I tried to contact my family and was rebuked by the statement, "we do not know you." So here I was alone in Texas starting my new life. The first thing on the list of twenty-one things to do was to get a driver's license. I attempted several times to find out how to get my license and this took several trips to the Department of Public Safety. Finally I did receive my license after taking both a written and driving test.

I started looking for a job to support myself by going to the library and writing my resume and starting my search of local teaching positions. I also was very fortunate to start building my church family by finding Agape Community Church. It would take two buses and a two mile walk but I attended regularly. I was befriended quickly and started building a network of friends. In all I was building a network of support and had strategically placed myself in a position that I could move out of the group home in several months.

This brings me to the point that I would like to make with this post. I observed all eight members of the group home. Some of the individuals were clearly bound to stay there for the rest of their lives, but there were some individuals that could make the transition back into society by being productive. However, they didn't. Why? I kept asking myself. Was it because they had not the motivation to try and better themselves. Was it because they could live comfortably on SSI or SSDI and didn't have the stimulus to try. I will never know the answer to that question, however, I knew for myself I would try to better myself and move into an apartment in Fort Worth so as to become part of society once again.

This is an important question I believe for all social workers to address. What motivates my consumer and how can I get him or her to move beyond their circumstances?

Thank you for reading.